Monday, November 11, 2013

A New Thing

Is anyone out there listening anymore? Well, I know you are out there...I see the daily hits. If I don't know you personally, I would love to meet you! Come out of hiding & let me know who you are. :)

 I know I don't really "blog" much anymore. Pink Lucy has turned into the daily furbaby photo display. So I think I'm going to try & start being more vocal on here again. I feel like my voice was silenced in a way. Not sure why or how. But I have closed myself off for some reason. I was hurt in some friendships in the past & little by little I have become more withdrawn. I don't share what I am going through anymore. I'm the "go to friend", not the one who opens up about my life or my issues. I think partly that is because on the rare occasion when I do become vulnerable, I get hurt. So I choose to not be so transparent anymore.

I was looking back on my blog...I have been blogging since...I had to go look...Since 2004! Good night above! Almost 10 flippin' years??? Woah. Well, thank you Jesus, I'm not who I was 10 years ago or who I was 5 years ago. I was transparent back then...To a fault & I said things on this blog, that I regret. I allowed my blog to be my place to vomit at the mouth about stuff, when I shouldn't have. And for that I am ashamed. God has done a number on me when it comes to things I say or thinking I need to voice my opinion in a public forum without restraint. Just because it's my blog, doesn't mean I need it get nasty. It ain't fittin'. It just ain't fittin'. (Can anyone tell me what movie that quote is from?) With that being said, it doesn't mean I won't still voice my opinion, just in a different way.

So...I have decided to be transparent once again...But with caution. ;) Not sure how often I will blog longer written entries, but I feel the need to write once again. So we shall see....

I actually opened up this post to blog about something I am beginning today & ALL of the above came flowing from my fingers (it's been in my heart for a long time, I guess it was time to come out). Now...On to this new change...I have done research, lots of thinking & praying. Beginning today I will start a new way of eating. It's not a diet. It's just healthier choices. I'm going gluten free. Now....I don't want to be one of those yo-yo dieters, who get on the latest diet/exercise bandwagon. And post about it all with zeal, to only fail miserably. This is a new lifestyle for me. One that I hope to implement for the rest of my life. Part of me thinks I must be mad starting this now...Right at the holidays. But how I see it is, if I can make it through the holidays...I can make it through anything, right? I'm going to be honest...I have not dieted or cared about what I was eating in 5 years. That's a long time to just eat whatever the heck I wanted to with no regards for it's affects. That's just shameful, isn't it? I am an emotional eater. I eat for comfort. I eat because I'm bored. And I eat because I'm stuck in the house 24/7. I eat to fill a void. But whatevs. No excuses anymore. I have not been on a scale in 2 years. I battled bulimia for years (it's still in the back of my mind. That filthy beast.), but I don't weigh myself because the scale becomes my enemy very fast. So...That is why I haven't been on a scale in 2 years. And our scale needed a new battery. Ha! But that battery was replaced the other day & I was appalled at the number that stared back at me. I had already decided to make this change in my eating before I saw that number, but THAT cemented.

Why am I choosing gluten free? I have read about the benefits it has for PCOS, fibromyalgia (which I have never admitted to on this blog) & eczema. I do not have Celiac Disease, so if a little gluten gets eaten it's not going to kill me. I'm not going to be extremely strict. I'm going to be as gluten free as possible.  But I want to see how my body reacts to not having it in my system. I will mainly be eating meats/veggies/nuts/fruit. It's good for you foods, anyway. Breaking my pasta addiction is going to be the hard one. But there are gluten free pastas. I just don't want to rely on them. I want to try to learn to not eat pasta, even if it is gluten free. I did get a box to try it though.

Yesterday I went & got things to fill my cabinets for my new healthier lifestyle. It's going to be fun. And it's going to be a challenge. But it's one I am looking forward to. And one I am ready for. It takes YOU being ready to change...To make those steps. Other people can't make those changes for you. Not sure how much I will blog about this in the future. I may decide to give updates here or there. Not sure yet. Remember...I've been closed up for awhile. I'm just opening the curtains a bit & peeking out. I may get blog shy again. Haha! Either way, I hope you will come along on this new journey with me. And please leave me a comment from time to time. I would love to hear from you!

~Toodles

6 comments:

  1. Yeah for more blogging! I think I'll start back as well. When Facebook became more popular, I lost the will to blog; but it's slowly coming back!

    I love you and you can TOTALLY do this lifestyle change!

    B/c it's a change and not a diet, it's easier to manage when you have a "bad" day (or a bad couple of days). You won't kick yourself so hard. You'll own it and move on.

    I'm here for you sista!

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    1. Oh girl! You have been a TOTAL inspiration to me! Thank you so much! Love you back!

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  2. Yay! I was so glad today when I saw you posted a blog! Keep them coming! :)

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  3. With Cy going gluten free, I have had to in a bit. Cooking 2 kinds of pasta was getting old fast. Now that I found a "reasonably priced" GF free pasta, I can change over. By Cy has to be totally GF because of allergies to it, not celieac, just allergic apparently. My vice is bread. I don't eat alot of it, but I like a sub every now and then and stuffing for turkey. I have ot found a good GF bread - they taste like sand. And gluen hides in SO many places! Good grief it makes me nuts! I have to read every label and think carefully what I am going to be cooking and what I need. Good substitutes for flour to thicken sauces are rice flour, potato flour, arrowroot or xanthan gum. Potato starch thickens WAY too quick. I have also found a gluten free baking flour in the organic aisle.

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    1. Thank you for the advice, Denise! I may be asking for more along the way.

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